Self-Mastery, Stuckness, and Playing in the Sandbox
There’s a point in leadership where you realize:
You’re not just building a business. You’re building yourself.
I’ve been living that in real time for a couple of years now.
And last week, I had two conversations with leaders who were standing at the same edge I’ve been learning to cross.
- Both smart.
- Both capable.
- Both stalled.
No goal. No system.
Just a gnawing sense of “not good enough.”
Different roles, different industries—but the same undertone:
- “I’m doing the work… but I’m not seeing the growth.”
- “I don’t want to make the wrong move.”
- “I feel stuck.”
And I saw it so clearly—because I’ve lived it.
You get trapped in what I call the sandbox of almost:
- Doing just enough to say you’re trying
- Not enough to really move forward
- Just enough to stay disappointed in yourself
Why?
Because deep down, you haven’t decided to go all in.
That edge of almost…
- Where you feel busy, but not effective.
- Where momentum never seems to stick.
- Where you hesitate—not because you’re weak, but because the cost feels high or unclear.
The cost of clarity. The cost of commitment. The cost of transformation.
And that’s when it hit me:
- Fearing doing the wrong thing IS doing the wrong thing.
- Indecision IS a decision.
- Comfort IS the enemy of clarity.
And the antidote?
Mastering yourself. You. Nobody else.
My story recently?
I’ve been carrying the weight of growing a team, scaling a business, and leading $100M client transformations.
And I keep asking: Why does this feel so heavy?
The truth?
Because I’m not just leading OTHERS.
I’m leading MYSELF through them.
That’s the cost of transformational leadership. Pain. Struggle. Breakthrough.
If I want a team that owns their role, moves with clarity, and acts with conviction—
then I have to be the model of internal mastery.
Your team, your family, your friends… they aren’t listening to your advice. They’re watching what you do. Who you are. Who you become.
If they see you:
- Sleeping well
- Eating healthy
- Working out
- Limiting or eliminating self-medication
- Speaking calmly
- Not overreacting, overreaching, or over-functioning
They’ll see the shift in your leadership:
- From doing → to forming
- From controlling → to coaching
- From pressuring → to presence
If you’re building a business, family, or legacy…
You have to build the builder first.
That’s you. And that’s me. That’s US.|
Me?
I’m not just scaling a company.
I’m building belief. Vision. Ownership. Simon.
And it all starts on the inside.
This is the battle.
And I’m all-in.
Are you?