When the Path Gets Stuck in the Weeds, Leadership Has to Go Higher

I’ve been thinking a lot about how leadership really works — especially when emotions are high and the future’s unclear.

One of the most dangerous places to lead from?
That quiet, foggy middle where no one’s outright disagreeing… but no one’s really aligned either.

That’s where assumptions grow.
That’s where expectations diverge.
That’s where momentum dies.

Recently, I caught myself drifting into that space — trying to make progress without full clarity, just to “keep things moving.”

And then it hit me:

The biggest killer of momentum isn’t disagreement. It’s indecision.

And indecision is usually a sign of misalignment.

That realization cut deep — because I value speed. I value direction. But leadership isn’t just about moving fast.
It’s about knowing when to slow down and ask: What are we really deciding here?

So I shifted.
I stopped driving the outcome and started asking better questions — of my team, of our clients, and of myself:

  • What’s unclear right now that we haven’t named?
  • What tension are we avoiding?
  • What assumptions are driving our actions?

And most importantly:

What decision are we not making that’s holding us back?

I’ve come to believe that this is one of the core responsibilities of leadership:

To clear the fog.
To surface what’s unspoken.
To realign around what’s true — even if that means slowing down in the short term.

I’m not here to drift into dead-end partnerships, vague strategies, or emotionally charged guessing games.
I’m here to build aligned momentum.
And that starts with naming what’s real — even when it’s hard.

If you’re in a fog right now — in a project, a relationship, a decision — pause.
Not to retreat, but to reorient.

Because clarity creates motion.
And leadership clears the way.

Don’t Carry Your Company Alone: What I’m Learning About Leadership, Ownership, and Letting Go of the Weight

Over the years, I’ve noticed something in how I lead—and in how I work with my team.

I’m a visionary. A builder. A quick-start. A coach at heart.
And when I believe in someone, I go all in.

I cast the vision.
I bring the fire.
I chart the path.

And then… when they hesitate, get overwhelmed, or drift—I fill the gap.
I clarify. I coach. I push. I carry.

And it works—until it doesn’t.
Until I realize I’m no longer building with people.
I’m building for them.

The Pattern That Keeps Repeating

I see potential. I feel their hunger. I speak into their future.
But when results don’t come, I step in again.

  • I give more clarity
  • I offer more direction
  • I take on more emotional weight

And here’s the trap:
It feels noble, but it’s exhausting.
It feels like leadership, but it’s often over-functioning.

And it always leads to the same place:
Resentment. Confusion. Misalignment.

The Real Issue Isn’t Them. It’s Me.

I used to think the problem was underperformance.
Then I thought it was lack of follow-through.
But now I see it:

The issue is my default to carry what others haven’t chosen to own.

That’s not on them. That’s on me.

It’s my fear of slowing down.
My discomfort with drift.
My impatience with watching someone struggle through their own fog.

So I step in.

But that creates a culture where people can believe in the vision without embodying it.
Where clarity is always external.
Where ownership is optional.

And that’s not what I want.

This Isn’t a Tactics Problem

In business, we love to solve with tools.
Tweak the system. Add a new KPI. Try another framework.

But this isn’t a system problem. It’s not about prospecting or process.
It’s about self-leadership—theirs and mine.

The real bottleneck is always identity.

And the real shift I’m making isn’t about doing less coaching.
It’s about doing less carrying.

So What Now?

I’m learning to ask myself:

  • Am I leading someone… or lifting them?
  • Am I giving them clarity—or robbing them of their own process?
  • Am I creating growth—or just compensating for discomfort?

I don’t want a team that relies on me to move.
I want a team that rises with me to lead.

That means I stop fixing.
Stop chasing.
Stop filling every gap.

And start creating the kind of culture where people show up fully—because they’ve chosen to.

The Bottom Line

I’m not here to carry people to results.
I’m here to build a culture where people choose growth for themselves.
Where ownership isn’t gifted—it’s claimed.

Because I believe in transformation.
And transformation doesn’t happen when I do the work for you.

It happens when you say: I’m ready.
And when I say: Let’s go.